Give and Take: Why Helping Others Drives Our Success PDF

The concept of give and take is central to many types of relationships, including friendships. It can be seen in how friends make plans and invite one another along, pay for their fair share of expenses during group activities, listen fully to their friends when they want to vent or discuss a problem, and even how friends divide tasks between them. While it is impossible to be totally equal in all of these areas, giving more than you take can help a friend’s relationship flourish.

In business, Grant’s research shows that a willingness to help others achieve their goals can yield desirable performance outcomes in a wide variety of occupations, including more revenue and higher quality customer service. Nevertheless, he also discovered that givers can sink to the bottom of the success ladder in a number of occupations if they are taken advantage of or burn out.

Givers can re-educate themselves to avoid being exploited. They can reframe negotiations so that they emphasize their interest in being fair to others, and they can learn techniques for appropriate self-advocacy that feel compatible with generosity. They can also ask people who receive their assistance to “pay it forward,” so that they can continue to meet requests without having to shoulder the burden themselves.

In short, a generous mindset can be a powerful tool for success, but it is important that managers teach employees how to distinguish generosity from three other attributes that tend to travel with it: timidity, availability, and empathy. By doing so, they can save their best workers from being exploited, and empower them to attain the stature that their colleagues deserve.